Blue and Yellow

A sincere truth in life, is that one can count on one hand how many good friends they have had in their lifetime.  I am not talking about the so-called friend who taught you a lesson or was there one day to be gone the next.  I am talking about the true blue, one of a kind friend that you can’t help but lower your wall to and let them in for real.  The friend who contributes to a real sense of loyalty and offers a new feeling of contentment.  The kind of loyalty and contentment that friendships or relationships for that matter, rarely seem to contain.  Now you may think you know where I am going with this, but I doubt it.  And perhaps you think you know because you are the kind of person who has a fan club and this grand social life… well, then good for you!  However, the truth is, a true blue, damn good and loyal friend is so hard to come by that most people never get the chance to experience one.


When I first met “you”, I was magnetized by your friendliness, your desire to get to know me and of course your repeated call to just “hang out”.  My reluctance to let you in too quickly didn’t appear to bother you.  My past unsuccessful friendships could be part to blame for my candor of independence.  But for the most part I contribute my hesitation to a sense of loneliness that has so often lingered around.  I never expected for a moment that it would ever go away.


Your persistence with me was incredible. The things you did for me wholeheartedly were over the top.  After many moments past, not to mention being human and all, I eventually and slowly let you in. I allowed myself to become vulnerable, as we all do. 


Now this is the interesting part of a friendship.  Yours as well as Their true colors begin to unravel.  You learn who your friend really is.  This is a point in the relationship where there are a number of decisions to be made:


Are their intentions cruel? What are your intentions?

Can you help this person become a better person? Can they help you become a better person?


The truth is, part of being in a friendship is to reciprocate being a friend.    Communication, support and vulnerability, Oftentimes, destroy relationships. However shouldn’t these things be the very things that bring you together.  What strengthens your bond.  What shows that you are committed. 


Now, there are obviously more issues, matters and concerns that involve a friendship, no doubt.  But when you find out who your friend is behind the mask… this is the point where you also make the decision to stick around or run like hell!


And as for “you” and “I”, well, I can only speak of my present feelings towards you.  Not the… could of, should of, would have times. Or the wish we could have times.  I guess I should have known better.  I never believed that a true blue friend could ever exist anyway.   Then again, those moments of contentment were pure happiness.  There were moments where loneliness was the furthest thought from my mind.  I would have died for your honor. 


I do not hate you.  However I do not feel sorry for you.  I cannot sympathize for you.  And ya, ya, there is always more than one side to a story, to our story.  Your diarrhea of the mouth had multiple stories of it’s own.  The Eulogy of our friendship and a tear!


And then, as if you had returned from the dead, you are sure to run into me.  How appropriate!  You got your “hello, how are you doing?”  You want a friend again?


And I would be lying if I said I felt nothing.  I felt I was ready.  I felt happy.  I feel content.  I feel optimistic.I feel hopeful.  I feel that a true blue friend just might exist.  












2 thoughts on “Blue and Yellow

  1. TRue says:

    I have 2 “True Blue” friends…I hope they know who they are. Why do we have friends anyway? Build us up to break us down? Do we envy one another just to be jealous in the end. Why are we not content in life to only have acquaintances??? In the end, if you have to work hard to love your friend, then better to have no friend at all.

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